Updated: 13 May 2018 06:20. By, Melkisedeck Shine.
Heat, because you can catch a cold.
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Because it was a-head.
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At the corner.
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A title wave.
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Because her students were so bright.
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The Christmas alphabet has Noel.
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I’m stuck on you.
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Because she wanted to make-up her mind
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I’m stuffed!
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I don’t see your point.
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Unknown Calls ;
He : Hey , Do you have boy friend ?
She : Yes , Who are you ?
He : Im your brother , Just wait till
i come home !
Another Unknown call
He : Hey , Do you have boyfriend ?
She : No !
He : Im your boyfriend ,You just
broke my heart
She : Sorry , I thought it was my
brother !
He : Haha ! Im your brother Let
me reach the house
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The spelling bee.
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A man walking down the streets sees another man with a very big dog. One man says to the other, "Does your dog bite", the man replies "No my dog doesn't" The man pats the dog and has his hand bitten off, "I thought you said your dog didn't bite" said the injured man. "Thats not my dog", replied the other.
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Because it’s too far to walk.
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Answer: Mice cream.
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😂Other short jokes;-👇
BUSINESS PLAN
The process of putting together a business plan, including the thought you put in before beginning to write it, forces you to take an objective, critical, unemotional look at your business project in its entirety. The business plan is an operating tool, which, if properly used, will help you manage the business and work effectively towards its success… read more
Interesting story for new year
Ezra and Thomas joined a company together a few months after their graduation from university.
After a few years of work, their Manager promoted Ezra to a position of Senior Sales Manager, but Thomas remained in his entry level Junior Sales Officer position.
Thomas developed a sense of jealousy and disgruntlement, but continued working anyway.
One day Thomas felt that he could not work with Ezra anymore.
He wrote his resignation letter, but before he submitted it to the Manager, he complained that Management did not value hard working staff, but only promoted only the favoured!
The Manager knew that Ezra worked very hard for the years he had spent at the company; even harder than Thomas and therefore he deserved the promotion.
So in order to help Thomas to realize this, the Manager gave Thomas a task.
“Go and find out if anyone is selling water melons in town?”
Thomas returned and said, "yes there is someone!"
The Manager asked, "how much per kg?"
Thomas drove back to town to ask and then returned to inform the Manager; "they are 13.50 per kg!"
The Manager told Thomas,
"I will give Ezra the same task that I gave you. Please pay close attention to his response!"
So the Manager said to Ezra, in the presence of Thomas;
“Go and find out if anyone is selling water melons in town?”
Ezra went to find out and on his return he said:
"Manager, there is only one person selling water melons in the whole town.
The cost is 49.00 each water melon and 32.50 for a half melon.
He sells them at 13.50 per kg when sliced. He has in his stock 93 melons, each one weighing about 7kg.
He has a farm and can supply us with melons for the next 4 months at a rate of 102 melons per day at 27.00 per melon; this includes delivery.
The melons appear fresh and red with good quality, and they taste better than the ones we sold last year.
He has his own slicing machine and is willing to slice for us free of charge.
We need to strike a deal with him before 10am tomorrow and we will be sure of beating last year's profits in melons by 223 000.00.
This will contribute positively to our overall performance as it will add a minimum of 3.78% to our current overall sales target.
I have put this information down in writing and is available on spreadsheet.
Please let me know if you need it as I can send it to you in fifteen minutes."
Thomas was very impressed and realized the difference between himself and Ezra.
He decided not to resign but to learn from Ezra… read more
Facts about midnight prayer
Facts about MIDNIGHT prayer:.. read more
Short love story
SHORT LOVE STORY 1.I stood at the bus stop near the National bank with my earphones on.The Egerton welfare bus had taken long beforearriving.I kept on glancing side from side and watched people walk in diffrent direction with least interest… read more
Feel this joke
Two boys stole a big bag of oranges from a neighbor & decided to go to a quiet place to share the lot equally… read more
Normal body conditions
*BLOOD PRESSURE*
--
120/80 — Normal
130/85 —Normal (Control)
140/90 — High
150/95 — V.High.. read more
Tips to keep yourself healthier
Drinking hot lemon water can prevent cancer. Don't add sugar. Hot lemon water is more beneficial than cold lemon water… read more
10 words of wisdom to Africa
The late Dr Myles Munroe was a man of wisdom… read more
Difference of men and women at their age
Women are fickle minded.At 18, they want handsome men.At 25, they want matured men.At 30, they want successful men.At 40, they want established men.At 50 ,they want faithful men… read more
WHAT A MESSAGE
"A certain gentleman walked into a hotel and after perusing through the menu ordered for some food. After about 20 mins another group of gentlemen walked in and ordered for theirs… read more
STORY Be that kind of woman
Sometime ago, a man went with his wife in their car to a fuel station, while they were buying the fuel, the man discovered that it was the wife's ex boyfriend that is attending to them, He then smiled and turned to his wife and said, "you would have ended up marrying that petrol attendant", but the wife smiled and said, "if I had married him, He will be the one sitting by the steering of the car".. read more
Story of Peter and his Girlfriend Mercy
*Peter and his girlfriend Mercy were walking during the night..*.. read more
How to overcome fear
Understand Your Fear Try to understand why you fear or what causes you to fear. Only when you have identified the source of your fear can you start on the process of overcoming it. You can start by listing all your fears on your notepad and then striking them off once you have overcome them. Breathe Deep Taking deep breaths when you are scared or worried helps you relax to a great extent. Make sure that you exhale longer than you inhale. Fear will automatically reduce since you will also calm down… read more
Which kind of witchcraft should I use?
People smoke and drink for a few days and get addicted to it… read more
I love this interpretation of Prayer
What is a prayer?
Prayer doesn't just happen when we kneel or put our hands together and focus and expect things from God.
Thinking positive and wishing good for others is a prayer.
When you hug a friend… read more