Updated: 12 May 2018 16:29. By, Melkisedeck Shine.
A budgie with a blunt beak.
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Tulips, because they have two lips.
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An envelope.
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Let me count the ways I love you.
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A stick.
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A nervous wreck.
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Answer: A walk.
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Answer: In snow banks.
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Because she had two left feet.
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They read their horror-scopes.
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Answer: A door.
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A bagel.
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Because it was the chickenβs day off.
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Because it had ticks.
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Brilliant Answers by a Student who got 0% Marks.
Question .1 - In which battle did Tipu Sultan Died ?
Ans.- In his Last Battle.
Question .2- What is the Main Reason for Divorce ?.
Ans.- Marriage.
Question .3- Ganga Flows in which State ?
Ans.- Liquid State.
Question .4- When was Mahatma Gandhi Born?
Ans.- On His Birthday
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πOther short jokes;-π
A letter from an aborted child
Dear Mum,
I have decided to talk to you to let you know my
feelings. I want to know why you did it. My story
is short. I stayed inside you for only a couple of
weeks. I was very comfortable and warm. I felt
really protected. I knew you were a special
person because you never stopped me from
eating the food you ate… read more
Interesting facts from beans
I found this interesting …
Before you cook beans you go through a selection process in which all the seemingly bad beans are thrown away so only the good beans remain for cooking.
However, when rain comes, the bad beans you threw away in the backyard become seeds, germinate and grow into beautiful crops, with luscious leaves.
From them come plenty of bean seeds and the very same person who judged and threw them away will pluck the leaves and seeds for a healthy meal.
You may be judged, despised and discarded today, but, who knows, the same people judging you will turn to you in your moment of glory.
Do not curse yourself when the world look down on you. Your rain could be a matter of time. Your germination moment could just be around the corner!.Stay focused on your life goals and give your job the best. The best is yet to come.!.. read more
Just a notice to you
‘``1. πNo matter how beautiful and handsome you’re just remember Baboon and Gorillas also attract tourists .
βStop Boastingβ.. read more
Planning Concepts
Decentralization is highly linked with local government system and has been practiced in the country in varying degrees since colonial times. Historically, the concept of decentralization has never been a new concept in countries across the globe. The term attracted attention in the 1950s and 1960s when British and French colonial administrations prepared colonies for independence by devolving responsibilities programs to local authorities.. read more
How to make people like you
Don't criticize, condemn or complain. Give honest, sincere appreciation. Arouse in the other person an eager want. Become genuinely interested in other people. Smile. Remember that a manβs name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language. Be a good listener, encourage others to talk about themselves. Talk in terms of the other mans interest. Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely.. read more
My Brother Don't Be Cheated By Women π
My brother, don't be cheated that u can give your woman everything she needs… read more
Understanding Entrepreneurs and Entrepreneurship
There is no clear consensus among entrepreneurship specialists on the definition of the word βentrepreneurβ or that of its derivative, 'entrepreneurship'. While some people would treat small business owner managers and entrepreneurs as synonymous, the bulk of the entrepreneurship specialists attempt to draw a distinction between them. This distinction is central to an understanding of the meaning of 'entrepreneur'. We proceed to look at the definitions of these terms with a view to delineating the differences among them… read more
Think Critically act Positively
1. ON EARNING:
Never depend on single income. Make investment to
create a second chance… read more
Take this lesson for a poor young man
A very poor newly wedded, young couple lived in a small farm. One day the husband made the following proposal to his wife:
Honey, I will leave the house: I will travel faraway, get a job and work hard in order to come back and give you the comfortable life that you deserve. I do not know how long I will stay away, I only ask one thing, please wait for me, and while I am away, you should be faithful to me, because I will be faithful to you… read more
Funny mathematics paper
MATHEMATICS,PAPER 1 P299/2
Time:2:30mins
Instruction: Attempt any four
questions.
ALL QUESTIONS CARRY EQUAL MARKS… read more
Which kind of witchcraft should I use?
People smoke and drink for a few days and get addicted to it… read more
BUSINESS MANAGEMENT PLAN
Managing a business requires more than just the desire to be your own boss. It demands dedication, persistence, the ability to make decisions and the ability to manage both employees and finances. Your management plan, along with your marketing and financial management plans, sets the foundation for and facilitates the success of your business… read more
What our children and today's generation needs to know
When the ancient Chinese decided to live in peace, they made the great wall of China, They thought no one can climb it due to its height. During the first 100 year of its existence, the Chinese were invaded thrice … and every time, the enemy had no need of penetrating or climbing over the wall… because each time they bribed the guards and came through the doors… read more
Eating fruit on empty stomach
Cancer patients shouldn't die…. read more
Short love story
SHORT LOVE STORY 1.I stood at the bus stop near the National bank with my earphones on.The Egerton welfare bus had taken long beforearriving.I kept on glancing side from side and watched people walk in diffrent direction with least interest… read more