Updated: 12 May 2018 15:49. By, Melkisedeck Shine.

V.gif What dies but never lives?

A battery.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why do bees have sticky hair?

Because they have honeycombs.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Girlz are like….

Boy: Marry me?
Girl: Do you have a house?
Boy: No..
Girl: Do you have a BMW car?
Boy: No..
Girl: How much is your salary?
Boy: No salary.. but..
Girl: No but. You have nothing. How can I marry you? Just leave me, please!!
Boy: I have one villa, 3 property lands, 3 Ferraris, 2Porsches.. Why do I still needto buy BMW?! How can I get salary when actually I am the BOSS?
Girl : wanna get married ?
Boy: NO !
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Funny phone call

Unknown Calls ;
He : Hey , Do you have boy friend ?
She : Yes , Who are you ?
He : Im your brother , Just wait till
i come home !
Another Unknown call
He : Hey , Do you have boyfriend ?
She : No !
He : Im your boyfriend ,You just
broke my heart
She : Sorry , I thought it was my
brother !
He : Haha ! Im your brother Let
me reach the house
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif If a butcher wears a size XL shirt and a size 13 shoe, what does he weigh?

Answer: Meat.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif How do monsters tell their fortunes?

They read their horror-scopes.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Which vegetable should you never invite on a boat trip?

A leek.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why did the man take his clock to the vet?

Because it had ticks.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What runs but never walks?

A hose.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif WHY DO STUDENTS FAIL?

A year has 365 days
Sundays :52
balance :313 summer
holidays:50
bal:263days
8hours daily sleep means 122
days
bal:141days
1 hour daily playing means
15days
bal:126days
2 hours daily foodmeans 30 days
bal:96days
1hr 4 talking means15 days
bal:81days
exam days total in year 35days
bal:46 days
festival 40days
bal:6day
sickness 3days,movies & functions
at least2days,
balance-1day,
that 1 day is Ur birthday
HOW CAN A STUDENT PASS?
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What do you call a pig that does karate?

A: A pork chop.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What's the difference between a shopping trolley and a University vice chancellor?

You fill them both up with as much food and alcohol you can, but it's only the shopping trolley that has a mind of its own.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What kind of weather does a turkey like?

Fowl weather.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Where do ghosts go for a swim?

The Dead Sea.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Whatโ€™s a catโ€™s favorite nursery rhyme?

Three Blind Mice.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


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